It’s one of those things I have started to wonder about, now that I’m getting into the second half of the first year of a serious relationship. You know, wonder about the future, wonder how long the giggly honeymoon phase lasts, wonder if this will really kick off or is something else going to come up, and wonder about that pesky L-word. Some people take the idea very seriously, while others just let the feelings and the time flow.
I usually consider myself as the latter choice, because I don’t believe allowing myself to stress/overthink emotions is something practical or even necessary to do. You feel what you feel and just go from there, right? On the flip side, I’m older now; any relationships/flings/romances/relations I had in the past were from a time where I was younger, less mature, less practical, less serious. I let by-gones be by-gones and I never held on to anything with serious intentions. I always told myself that if things didn’t work out, move on to something else.
I still think that for many things now, although I have learned to put more serious and focused work on things that matter NOW. My career attempts, for example, is a goal I feel very strongly towards, now that I have found a field I enjoy and desire to develop within. Quite frankly, I almost stumbled on the idea by sheer chance, but I wouldn’t change the moment for anything else. I also take living and caring for myself much more seriously; I have change my dietary menu (vegetarian), I have learned to shop and save with or without coupons (Aldi’s and Costco also helps), I have learned to take care of bills, charges, taxes, making appointment, tending to car maintenance, fixing things in the home, etc. I have learned to live like a proper adult and take responsibilities as expected, so in that aspect, I consider myself doing a job well done!
*pat on the back*
Back to my original thought, the whole relationship factor. This time, after some flops in the past, I took a different route based on advice from a friend: online dating.
Anyways, I figured the worst that could happen is… well, a lot of things honestly, but I went ahead and chanced it. After some trials and fails, I landed a rather likable male who was suited according to my interests (omg he knows how to make conversation, omg he has a real career, omg he pays his own bills and owns a car….), and 6+ months later, it appears to still be working out pretty successfully. I like this guy. A lot, probably.
So that L-word. I went around and ask some friends when they started dropping it to their significant others and the average result I got was 4-5 months into the relationship. I questioned my findings and pondered on people’s desire to say the word with the right meaning behind it. I was curious what made people make the change from like to love, and I listened to stories of newfound loves and tragic romances (typically not by choice). I, then, took a look at myself and what I had going on.
I didn’t really come to a solid conclusion on myself, but I know what I have going on is something special and quite frankly, rather dear to me. I like where things are going and I am just going to keep it at that.